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Maverick Nationals senator Barnaby Joyce is fronting a television ad campaign against a Chinese company’s proposed investment in troubled resource giant Rio Tinto.
The ads tap into the widely-held antipathy towards China’s communist rulers, and the view that Australian iron should never be allowed to turn red.
Senator Joyce became concerned after hearing of confidential Chinalco plans to dig up Australia’s precious ore and somehow spirit it back to China.
But Rio Tinto refuses to believe that the Chinalco investment could lead to that outcome, suggesting that someone would notice if an attempt was made to remove all the ore.
Mining industry analysts contacted by The Daily Grind confirmed that in order to remove the ore, the Chinese would need massive, several-kilometre-long trains and some sort of “bulk” boat.
An alternative theory is that Chinalco will irradiate the ore in an effort to boost the value of their own stocks, a plan perhaps inspired by the low-budget Chinese spy flick Orefinger.
Senator Joyce’s campaign slogan is “Keep Australia Australian.” Other campaign messages include “true blue”, “dinky-di” and “ridgey-didge”. The 15-second ads are followed by 26 minutes of the audience vomiting.
A deleted scene from the ads features Senator Joyce eating Vegemite, drinking Fosters, wearing a Akubra and saying “Rio Tinto. It’s Australian for ‘river of red’.”
Senator Joyce became concerned after hearing of confidential Chinalco plans to dig up Australia's precious ore and somehow spirit it back to China.
